Compulsive Sexual Behaviour

Are you struggling with intense and uncontrollable sexual urges?

You may be experiencing compulsive sexual behaviour (CSB). This condition is characterized by repetitive sexual thoughts and actions that disrupt your daily life.

If you are missing out on real life events because of your compulsive sexual behaviour- it’s a problem. If you find that you are struggling to get or maintain an erection or have no desire for real intimacy - it’s a problem. If you can’t connect with your partner as your mind is elsewhere- it’s a problem. If you are lying to spend more time with the compulsive sexual behaviour- it’s a problem. It is not just pornography, it’s any compulsive sexual behaviour that feels out of control or risky in some way.

CSB can impact various aspects of your well-being:

Relationships: It can strain or damage your connections with loved ones.
Work: Difficulty focussing at work can lead to decreased levels of productivity.
Sexual Health: You may experience problems with intimacy or sexual functioning.
Mental Health: Feelings of anxiety, confusion and shame are common.

Remember you are not alone. Help is available to manage CSB and build a healthier relationship with your sexuality.

The concept of sex addiction is a complex one and the term itself isn’t included in the latest diagnostic manuals. The media often portrays “sex addiction” in a dramatic light, not reflecting the complexities of the issues. The World Health Organisation ICD-11 does recognise Compulsive Sexual Behaviour (CSBD) as an impulse control disorder. This means that people have repetitive sexual urges they struggle to control, causing significant distress and problems in their lives. The use of the word ‘Addiction’ implies a dependence on a substance or activity that alters the brain chemistry. While CSBD can be very destructive it doesn’t involve the same physiological changes as substance abuse.

Regardless of the debate by Mental Health Professionals about the use of the word ‘Addiction’ the most important thing is to get a proper diagnosis and find the effective treatment for anyone struggling with compulsive sexual behaviour.

Potential signs of CSB:

Missing Out on Real Life: When CSB takes priority over work, social activities or responsibilities or when it disrupts normal life.
Sexual Dysfunction: Difficulties with arousal, desire or performance can be a sign of underlying issues including CSBD.
Relationship Issues: A preoccupation with CSBD is a red flag to potentially the erosion of trust in relationships.
Beyond Pornography: CSBD can manifest in a variety of ways, not just use of pornography. CSBD can serve as a coping mechanism for deeper issues.
It can stem from emotional discomfort, anxieties or difficulties with intimacy.
It can be a temporary escape from uncomfortable feelings, offering a sense of control, excitement or relief.
It can avoid vulnerability or fear of intimacy leading to impersonal sexual encounters rather than risking deeper emotional connection.an

While CSBD offers temporary relief it ultimately creates problems at work, in relationships and in overall well-being.

By addressing the underlying causes of CSBD you can find healthier ways to create fulfilling relationships. A therapist experienced in dealing with CSBD can help identify and work through any underlying issues.

Any sexual compulsive behaviour that feels risky or out of control is a concern. If you recognise these signs in yourself or someone you care about consider seeking the professional advice of a therapist such as myself who specialises in CSBD.

Mator Gabe’s view on addiction.

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